Dear Lady Goolie,

I spend the majority of my time in the workplace cruising the internet and chatting with my no-good friends. I need this job, you see, because I am saving to start a family. How much is too much to spend on lunch each day? How excited is too excited to be for lunch each day? Can you recommend any good books or television shows?

Signed,

Frequently Anticipating Tuna And Swiss Sandwiches




Dear FATASS,

There's nothing wrong with taking a vacation from the trials and tribulations of the modern workplace to slide around the world wide web. However, your behavior sounds slightly manic. First, ask yourself, are you really doing what you want to be doing professionally? Are you happy with your job? If so, stop monkeying around, someone might catch on and decide you're not working to your full potential. When it comes to lunch, I firmly believe that money is well spent on good food. It's something that no one should skimp on. I do not buy store brand groceries and I'm not ashamed of that. I have a collection of assorted fancy cheeses. I think and plan very carefully the meals I eat all day, It's most of what I think about. However I don't always have the cash for that. IDEA: Go to your favorite savory snack place and pretend you're waiting for someone, simultaneously take trips to the bathroom with pockets lined with napkins scoring scraps of foodies along the way. Eat in stall. Once you are full, leaving shrugging shoulders, stuffed and satisfied for free! Learn it, live it, loves it.
As for the book/television suggestions I have two words for you (for each category): Harlequin Romance, and Muppet Babies. That is all.

Best,
Lady Goolie